Thankful

It's been a rough couple of months financially & in other ways. I think the true test of growth and of true change is how you respond to the same stress and situations that before would have been too overwhelming for you. I am so thankful for putting my trust in God & for real faith in his ability to do any and every thing. It took a lot of time and work to get where I am now and I have really seen over the last couple of months how far I've come. In the past I would've been so worried that worry would have been my agenda for most days. Don't get me wrong there have been several times where I was just like ummm I really don't think this situation is going to work out well, but then I allowed myself to worry about it for a little while then I prayed about it, and then I did my best to truly give it to God. I have found the more I give the better the outcome/circumstances end up turning.

It's so easy to say yeah I have faith, yeah I'm giving this to God, yeah I'm following his plan for me, but then to turn around and do the opposite and then not understand how things got where they are. Or to say I am going to follow God's plan for my life... but I'm going to do this that and the third and not realize why things are not going right. LOL! We are so fallible and susceptible to our own feelings of power and control over our lives that it gets so easy sometimes to lose sight of what direction we need to go in and to realize that our trials, our success, our problems, our lives are really all God's and the less we rebel and fight against that the better our lives will be over all. I think we also lose sight of how our trials and tribulations aren't always just for the purpose of grounding us in/testing our faith or making us stronger but sometimes so that we can bless others in our lives. I try everyday to judge others less, judge myself a little less, and to find a way to reach out or help someone else. The best feeling sometimes is to help someone who you don't "have" to help or who doesn't expect you to care enough to help. Obviously, if you don't believe in God then this entire post doesn't really apply to you, but if you do, then you can't deny that-that feeling is definitely a reward that God gives you. When I stopped worrying so much about where everyone else was, what they were doing, in comparison to my life, I found myself.

I'm aware that I have so much further to go, but when I feel this feeling that I have in my heart on a regular basis a feeling of balance and contentment of love from God... the thought that there is more to come that this is just the beginning is such an exciting thought! I am not huge on other people's interpretation of God, The Bible, and religion, because for me I need to understand my God that I am praising and worshiping and that is far more important than being in line or doing what certain folks chose to interpret as right/wrong and otherwise. I'd much rather spend my time trying to move closer and to understand more for myself! :)

I am so thankful, I am tired as well (been working like a sweatshop worker lately) lol. I just can't express though how thankful I am: to be involved in a profession that I love to have a future in that profession to get a chance to help others on a daily basis to be an inspiration to others to continue to set goals to accomplish to give and receive love for strength of character a life full of purpose the ability to sacrifice clarity of mind, a vision, for the opportunity to develop my values and conquer my fears on a daily basis for LIFE!!!